Why Is My Wife Not Interested In Me Sexually?

Anxious husbands have a burning question. “Why is my wife not interested in me sexually? Here’s a secret: your wife’s sex drive didn’t vanish. I’m going to show you ONE attitude that’s a guaranteed turn-off for her.

The real problem in my marriage was a pandemic of pissyness that plagues many marriages.

Men (and their wives) can get WAY too familiar with each other. This is typically a bad sign as it really jacks with their chemistry.

Any sense of romantic or sexual polarity you USED TO have is dead.

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You’re farting in front of each other constantly and allowing that whiny, pissy side to enter conversations about what’s for dinner.

The cure?


No matter what, you must find a new energy of enthusiasm, connection and passion for something OTHER than plodding through another day of TV news, Zoom school and (ummm….) bags of Cheetos.

The truth about us guys is that we can get TOO comfortable with routine. TOO familiar.

Even BEFORE sheltering at home came in fashion, we can take the easy route. We meander in mediocrity quietly dreaming that SOMETHING exciting might come into our marriage, our bedroom and our life.

If You’re Asking, “Why Is My Wife Not Interested In Me Sexually”? It’s Time To Ask, “Has Anything New Been Coming Out Of Me?

The truth is that nothing new is coming into your life. Something new must come out of you.

Hell, I had to start building my he shed-she shed to get out of the house. That project alone has got my mojo amped up enough to shoot another video for you from the new deck of my 120 square foot “hotel paradise”. Maybe you’ll get to sleep here once my retreats start up again!

Here I talk in more detail about creating something new.

YouTube video

How to Cure Your Pandemic Pissyness (and improve your marriage at the same time!)

Leadership Starts With Leading Yourself

Many men we work with complain they can’t lead because nobody will follow.

They point out their attempts to engage with their wife or kids only to feel dismissed or rejected. They are missing a key point.

You can’t lead from the rear…you must lead from the front.

This means if you want to FEEL excitement, engagement, enthusiasm, connection, respect, affection and/or appreciation…you must FIRST GET GOOD AT BEING THOSE THINGS FOR YOURSELF!

I know! It’s like “Backwardsville”! How can being so self-centered possibly be construed as leadership?

It’s because talk is cheap. Nobody wants to follow someone who talks about what they want. They will always follow someone who is unapologetically and enthusiastically BEING what they want.

Some guys are jumping out of planes this week because they are afraid of heights. Other guys are disappearing in the middle of the day to fly kites with the kids. A few guys are finally buying that damn motorcycle they have been afraid to buy for fear of being criticized.

And one guy decided to grab his blow torch and roast marshmallows in his living room “campsite” with the kids. (you know who you are)

Now is the time for you to lead from the front. Demonstrate what excitement, enthusiasm and engaged LOOKS like. Allow everyone else to get caught up in your draft.

They will follow as long as you don’t look back.

This is the key to leadership. Go in the direction you passionately want to go and invite others to come along.

My community of men are ALL pushing each other to become this kind of man. And the daily stories of triumph are what made me write this post.

I’m so inspired by the energy building. It’s like the community was at one time a “small tropical depression” but has now gained hurricane strength.

The source of that strength is with other men who want what YOU want.

And I want that excitement, enthusiasm and engagement to get you whipped up into a category 3 storm.

Will you at least think about joining us? We need more fuel. And you’re just what we need to keep the fire burning!

Having my wife not interested in me sexually is long past now. Playful, sexy husbands have non-pissy attitudes! Your new attitude is key to creating a passionate-filled life. A Life that turns you both on.

Join Dan Dore and I in the Men’s Live Coaching Roundtable group for amazing conversation, coaching and insights. This is stuff your dad never told you.

And if you’re on the edge of divorce with threats of leaving or requests for “space” then the How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb online course would be perfect. This course taught by coach Tim Wade and I also has a large, active group of powerful men who support each other on a daily basis. It’s possible that the group interaction is more valuable than the 9 hours of video coaching in the course!

Click those links to get more information, videos and FAQ’s.

You’re in the right place.

author avatar
Steve Horsmon Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Steve Horsmon is a Certified Professional Life Coach and owner of Goodguys2Greatmen Relationship Coaching in Livermore, Colorado. He has appeared on many television, radio, youtube, and podcast channels discussing the coaching and psychology factors relating to maintaining healthy relationships. Steve provides personal, practical, action oriented coaching services for men through 1-on-1 coaching, private retreats, group coaching and workshops designed to give men new knowledge, skills and the right mindset to achieve their relationship goals. He is a committed, lifelong mentor for men who teaches his clients how to discover their masculine strength so they can confidently take the actions required to create the life and relationships that they really want. With over 10 years experience he has created thousands of videos and articles for well known relationship websites such as The Good Men Project, Medium and the Gottman Institute.
The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

This is the secret your dad never told you about – You have more power than you know.

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