Should Any Man Be Given This Much Sexual Power Over Women?

Hello Gentlemen and Ladies,

That happens to be famous ad headline used by a writer named Gene Schwartz.  He knew how to get attention.  And THAT is the very problem I want to talk with you about.

Don’t fall for it.  You’re way smarter than that and we both know it.

But you DID fall for it and so have I.  I’ve opened many emails with titles like this too many times.

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Because I’ve got the same “wiring” as you.  Our brains can trick us into believing that the best barometer of the happiness and health of our relationships is how much sex we have.

  • How to Make Her WANT YOU 7 Days a Week!!
  • 3 SIMPLE Secrets to Having Incredible Married Sex
  • 7 Days to Make Your Wife INSATIABLE!
  • 6 Steps to a Highly Sexual Marriage
  • Nympho Wife as Easy as 1-2-3!

They are almost irresistible, aren’t they?  These articles are all over the place and they are PREYING on your instinct and false belief that solving your sex problems is the only thing you need to do.

But, as most any professional article on relationship health will tell you, a lack of intimacy is only a symptom of other things going on in your relationship.

And most of those articles will try to give you more “secrets” about fixing those other things.

You will wear yourself out trying to fix your relationship by reading list after list of these secrets.

Why I Don’t Use Simple Sex Solutions to Attract Clients

I don’t use sex as a sales gimmick for 4 reasons

  1. You’re smarter than that and you deserve more respect.
  2. I’ll attract mostly low quality horn dogs for clients.
  3. It would be a “Bait and Switch” game you don’t need to play.
  4. Your relationship health and happiness does NOT START with fixing the sex           problem.

Do I talk about sex and its importance?  Yes!

Do I use direct and sensual language to get your attention?  Yes!

Do I try to connect with you on the notion that sex is important?  Yes!

I do all this because it is critical you know and feel without a doubt that I get you.

I understand the canyon of frustration and self-doubt we have over sex.

I understand the drought of intimacy your fear may last for the rest of your life.

I don’t sell sex as a solution because, on its own, sex has no chance in hell of helping you feel better, stronger, or more confident about the rest of your life.

In fact:

The men who end up with the best sex lives are those who BEGIN with feeling better, stronger, or more confident about the rest of their life.

What Now – Another List of Secrets?


Here’s the truth for both men and women.  These are the plain spoken reasons men and women most commonly experience a loss of emotional intimacy and physical attraction in their relationship.

None of these can be fixed with a list of “secret” things to do.

  • Uncontrolled and misunderstood anger
  • Resentment and game playing
  • Fear, insecurity, and blame
  • Low expectations of self and others
  • Poor communication and conflict management skills
  • Unresolved childhood trauma
  • Physical health, fitness, and body image issues
  • Lack of trust and respect
  • Inability to empathize and forgive
  • No respect for boundaries and healthy behavior
  • Poor personal hygiene and disgusting habits
  • No accountability for personal growth and learning
  • No self-respect or self-awareness

At least ONE of these issues (usually more) preceded your issues with intimacy.

How do I know this?

Because nearly 100% of the people I talk to can fondly remember when closeness and sex used to be so easy, so natural, and so FREQUENT.  Not one of the issues listed above was even close to being a reality in their relationship.

Now, a few years down the road, both partners remember the old days and crave those feelings.

So you start clicking on articles that promise to fix their sex lives with simple secrets.

And it’s clear why.

It is SO much easier than facing the truth.

Believing in Secrets is Easier than Facing the Truth – Or Is It?

No.  It isn’t.

Facing the truth is more like ripping off a Band-Aid.  It hurts just for a little bit at first, but then you are incredibly relieved that it is FINALLY gone.  You can finally move forward.

Facing the cold, hard truth about your part in your relationship is the most liberating feeling you will ever have.  It sets you up for success and gives you striking clarity about what to do next.

Messing around with your sex life problems by reading articles, talking to friends, blaming others, and living in misery is the worst form of self-help hell.  You end convincing yourself that you’ve done all you could possibly do.

The only possible option is divorce.  Right?

Probably not.  At least not until you have stepped up to admit that you’ve been believing your own B.S. and haven’t truly started thinking, doing, or saying anything substantially different than you have for the past 10 years.

You owe it to yourself to explore other options.

You owe it to yourself to use this time to learn and grow.

Will it save your marriage and your sex life?

First things first.

Let’s work on saving YOU from YOU first.  It’s your very best chance to improve both.

And I happen to be really good at helping you see that and ACT on that.

Powerful, personal, and wise coaching is your single best way for you to make the shift needed to change your life.

Grab a cup of something and your phone and let’s plan a lengthy chat about your side of the story.

Who else do you trust to listen to and understand every word you’ve got to say?

I guarantee that you will learn something you did not know.

Email me today at [email protected] to set up your first step.

P.S.  Yes, I coach BOTH men and women.  It’s probably best you keep this under your hat for at least our first call.  I’ll explain why when we talk.

To Better Life and Love,


author avatar
Steve Horsmon Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Steve Horsmon is a Certified Professional Life Coach and owner of Goodguys2Greatmen Relationship Coaching in Livermore, Colorado. He has appeared on well known coachign and psychology television, radio, youtube, and podcast channels related to maintaining healthy relationships. Steve provides intensely personal, action oriented coaching services for men through 1-on-1 coaching, private retreats and workshops designed to give men new knowledge, skills and mindset to achieve their relationship goals. He is a committed, lifelong mentor who teaches his clients to discover their masculine power, take bold action and create the life they want. He has written articles and guest blogs for numerous relationship and expert websites.

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  • Become more connected, aware and present with everyone (this is a critical step in your ability to build attraction and desire as well as have people trust you and respect you more).
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What kind of man is right for your coaching?

We work with men who are willing to take the lead in creating the changes they want in their life and relationships. We only work with men who want to understand their fears, insecurities and shame triggers. We teach you practical ways to deal with the mental and emotional challenges life throws at you and help you reach an unshakeable confidence in yourself (often for the first time in your life).

  • You won’t find negative, hateful language.
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  • You won’t find judgment or criticism from others.

We don't waste our time with all those things because we want to take the most efficient and effective path to creating the future you want. So we focus only on the things that are within your control: your thoughts, your words and your actions.

How do I know if I need coaching?

If you are feeling unhappy a lot of the time, if you're lonely, drained, lost, stuck or trapped, then our coaching will help. If you're not sure where your life is headed, if you're not confident in yourself, if you're not sure what you really want in life anymore...our coaching will help.

Whether it’s your job, your intimate relationship, or just wanting to feel more happy and with more purpose, then our coaching will help.

If you are tired of settling for a mediocre life or relationship, tolerating criticism and a lack of fun and intimacy and you're done with placating and playing it safe, then our coaching will help.

We will help you have clarity about what you're REALLY passionate about. We'll get you clear about where you want to be in six months and in six years. We help you figure out what you really want to create vs what other people think you should do.

We help you take action, get unstuck, start moving forward. We help you find what matters instead of just "being busy" in the daily grind. We help you figure out how you're going to get from where you are now to where you want to be.

For many of the guys we work with, they find a peace and a sense of emotional freedom that has them shaking their heads and smiling at how they used to approach life. They feel passionate about life again. They build stronger relationships with the people that matter most to them. They feel satisfied and fulfilled that they have finally found the “right path” forward and life starts to feel fun and inspiring again.

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