The BEST Way to Show Her “Thanks” – Change Your False Beliefs!

There is nothing more insidious in a relationship than the feelings of judgment, disapproval, and resentment.

These feelings slowly decay trust and undermine respect

They will ultimately destroy your relationship.

Those feelings often come from false beliefs we’ve been harboring for a long time.

Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity >>

Some of these beliefs are stupid stereotypes we’ve chosen to project onto our partner. We laugh about them with our friends.

Some of them have some basis in fact and experience.

But the most hurtful and unappreciative energy we can give to each other is constantly thinking, talking, and behaving as if these are ALWAYS true.

The single best way to reverse this negative energy and become ATTRACTIVE again is to fill in this diagram with new beliefs. Loving beliefs!

If you can replace the negative thoughts in this diagram with new, absolutely TRUE beliefs about the woman you love, I promise everything will start changing today.

There is a male version of this available for the ladies and it’s not pretty either.  If anyone wants that one, here is the link to the Male Brain.

I call this the process of “Giving Her (or him) a Reputation to Live Up To”.

When you think, speak, and act toward someone with these new beliefs in your heart, THEY will suddenly start responding to the new vote of confidence.

This is love in action. Show your gratitude for who she is – just as she is – and what she represents to you each day.

Save this image and print it off.

Then take a pen and cross through EACH negative belief and replace it with one TRUE FACT about your loved wife or girlfriend.

Fill out the blanks with positive, affirming beliefs YOU hold about HER.

Make it something only YOU could know.  Make some of them funny.  For example, call a small dot in her brain “Your ability to resist scratching the ear of every dog you see.”

You get the idea.  Then what?

Then sit privately with her and share them as if you do this every day.  Explain why you crossed out all the crap and why you wrote what you did. Tell her that THIS is how you see HER brain. Tell them how grateful you are to have them in your life.

Then kiss her and leave her with it. This has no strings. No expectations. No planned outcome.

Enjoy giving it just because you want to.

It’s a Thanksgiving gift.

I did this today for my lady and found myself laughing.  It’s a little scary.  It’s emotional too.

It’s supposed to be. You’re a loving, passionate human being.

You can do this.  Do NOT fear the reaction.  I know what you may be thinking.

It sure would be nice if SHE would do this for you, huh?  It may or may not happen.  Who cares?

Remember, it’s a gift without conditions.  It’s what you do.

Respond below if you care to share how it felt and how she/he took it.  It will help everyone to hear your story.

Getting comfortable with unconditional giving is a life skill every one us needs to practice!

author avatar
Steve Horsmon Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Steve Horsmon is a Certified Professional Life Coach and owner of Goodguys2Greatmen Relationship Coaching in Livermore, Colorado. He has appeared on well known coachign and psychology television, radio, youtube, and podcast channels related to maintaining healthy relationships. Steve provides intensely personal, action oriented coaching services for men through 1-on-1 coaching, private retreats and workshops designed to give men new knowledge, skills and mindset to achieve their relationship goals. He is a committed, lifelong mentor who teaches his clients to discover their masculine power, take bold action and create the life they want. He has written articles and guest blogs for numerous relationship and expert websites.

Frequently Asked Questions


Is our coaching right for you?

Our coaching process was created for men who want to feel happier and more fulfilled in their life and relationships. We teach you how to have more confidence and clarity about what you want in your life and create an action plan to start making it happen.

Do you only work with men in marriage?

While our coaching teaches you how to create a more connected, more fun and passionate marriage, we also work with you to have more clarity, enthusiasm and fulfillment in all areas of your life. We help you understand what you really want your future to look like and we also teach you how to be in control of your emotions so that you can be confident and assertive no matter how difficult your circumstances are right now .

What happens in the free 90-minute coaching call?

In our free initial coaching calls, we listen a lot, we ask you questions to understand what life is really like for you at the moment, we help you identify what you want to be different and what's holding you back from creating those changes now. Then we help you create a practical plan of action to start moving forward straight away.

What will I learn in your coaching programs?

We take you through a process to:

  • Stop being tentative and become more focused and directed.
  • Develop control over your thoughts and emotions like never before.
  • Become a master of the masculine and feminine dance required for a more passionate connection in your romantic relationships.
  • Build and sustain your personal masculine confidence so that you don't get "triggered" or feel disrespected and can respond with strength and confidence to any situation.
  • Become more connected, aware and present with everyone (this is a critical step in your ability to build attraction and desire as well as have people trust you and respect you more).
  • Stop the destructive emotions of anger and resentment which keep you going around in frustrating cycles and start from moving forward with purpose.
  • Stop being anxious, needy and overly reliant upon other people's opinions and approval of you and start feeling more peace, happiness and a deep sense of being a man who is confident in himself again.
  • You will become a confident man who knows his values, what he wants and where he’s going in his life.
  • You will learn how to think, speak and act according to your values without worrying about reactions from others.
  • You become clear and confident in your ability to create intimacy whenever you want.
  • Your confidence will be something that you start to rely on and trust in every part of your life.

How does the Men's Roundtable work?

Our Men's Roundtable membership gives you access to 3 live group coaching calls per month hosted by Steve and Dan as well as access to over 5 years of previously recorded group coaching calls, an invitation to our private facebook group, and ongoing assignments and resources to help you grow and develop as a confident masculine man. It's like having a personal coach in your pocket, ready to help whenever you need it.

What's the difference between the 1-to-1 coaching and group coaching?

Firstly, anyone who is in our 1-to-1 coaching program automatically receives access to the Men's Roundtable membership and group coaching for free for life. The difference between 1-to-1 and group coaching is down to the speed of change that you want to happen. With more personal time and attention from your coach, the 1-to-1 program is adapted to your specific circumstances and will provide the practical advice you need to know what to think, say and do to create what you want your future to be.

What kind of man is right for your coaching?

We work with men who are willing to take the lead in creating the changes they want in their life and relationships. We only work with men who want to understand their fears, insecurities and shame triggers. We teach you practical ways to deal with the mental and emotional challenges life throws at you and help you reach an unshakeable confidence in yourself (often for the first time in your life).

  • You won’t find negative, hateful language.
  • You won’t find a gender war – we don’t bash women.
  • You won’t find bitching, whining, complaining, and blaming.
  • You won’t find a group of men acting like victims.
  • You won’t find judgment or criticism from others.

We don't waste our time with all those things because we want to take the most efficient and effective path to creating the future you want. So we focus only on the things that are within your control: your thoughts, your words and your actions.

How do I know if I need coaching?

If you are feeling unhappy a lot of the time, if you're lonely, drained, lost, stuck or trapped, then our coaching will help. If you're not sure where your life is headed, if you're not confident in yourself, if you're not sure what you really want in life anymore...our coaching will help.

Whether it’s your job, your intimate relationship, or just wanting to feel more happy and with more purpose, then our coaching will help.

If you are tired of settling for a mediocre life or relationship, tolerating criticism and a lack of fun and intimacy and you're done with placating and playing it safe, then our coaching will help.

We will help you have clarity about what you're REALLY passionate about. We'll get you clear about where you want to be in six months and in six years. We help you figure out what you really want to create vs what other people think you should do.

We help you take action, get unstuck, start moving forward. We help you find what matters instead of just "being busy" in the daily grind. We help you figure out how you're going to get from where you are now to where you want to be.

For many of the guys we work with, they find a peace and a sense of emotional freedom that has them shaking their heads and smiling at how they used to approach life. They feel passionate about life again. They build stronger relationships with the people that matter most to them. They feel satisfied and fulfilled that they have finally found the “right path” forward and life starts to feel fun and inspiring again.

So now you've read that...what do you think? Would YOU like to try some of our coaching for free?

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

This is the secret your dad never told you about – You have more power than you know.

We respect your privacy, read our privacy policy here