Hey brother,
Do you find yourself in patterns of connection and then disconnection with your wife?
Want to know the Two Ways to Handle an Argument that NEVER Work?
One thing I became good at during 28 years of marriage was arguing badly.
The 3-Step Emergency Triage for You AND Your Marriage >>
I have a PhD in things that don’t work.
They say Thomas Edison once claimed, “I never had an experiment fail. I know 10,000 things that don’t work!”
I wish I could be so glib about all of my failed experiments when it came to getting into arguments.
Some arguments are really important. There are disagreements and conversations about important things where both sides need to be heard and understood.
I’m not talking about those.
I’m talking about arguments about stupid shit. I mean those little things that just don’t matter and should never cause the depth of negativity, contempt and hurt they do.
Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity >>
You know exactly which topics I’m talking about.
* How to properly clean a kitchen
* How to properly load a dishwasher
* Which brand of ketchup to buy
* Why someone spent $8 on something…anything
* What that last agitated look was for…etc.
So how do you quit fighting about stupid shit and start having adult conversations?
This video gives you some quick tips you can use tomorrow morning.
Here are the two ways of handling these arguments that will immediately cause even more harm than the argument itself.
1. Build an iron clad case of logic and historical evidence to prove that you are right and she is not only wrong, she’s most likely crazy and irresponsible. If it happens at 8pm, try to drag out your defense until 10pm with a disgusted look on your face.
2. Go totally silent. Stew in your anger and assume she is making a personal attack on your manhood and quite possibly your penis size. Disappear for the evening and have an exhaustive conversation in your head where you have all the “perfect comebacks”. Go to bed mad and ignore her.
I’m allowed to call you out on this stuff because…remember…I’ve earned a PhD in this stuff.
Both of those options have a 100% success rate in making matters worse, creating more distance, less attraction, less trust and less respect.
Both options also have a 100% success rate in making you feel horrible, giving you a knot in your gut, causing a loss of sleep and making you wish you could have a “do-over.”
Part of our coaching helps men have their “do-over”.
This is a powerful exercise of imagining yourself in a much more confident skin.
When you have your “do-over” from a clear, confident, calm place you are RESPONDING instead of REACTING.
You feel proud of who you are being and the situational awareness you have. It’s like watching it in slow motion. You don’t feel threatened.
You’re more curious and amused with yourself for almost taking the bait and implementing one of those bad options.
You breathe more deeply. You relax.
HOW do you do this?
It’s not a “how” question. It’s not about technique or tactics.
It’s a “why” question. It’s about principles and values.
Why does one man respond and another man react?
Because the man who responds has a totally different perspective.
It’s liberating. It’s the best form of freedom…emotional freedom.
If this is something you want, I’d like to schedule a chat with you to help you find out how to get it.
Below are some options for you to get started right away…
Free: If you’re serious about building your masculine mojo then apply for a coaching call with us we will help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you feeling confident again.
What do I mean by “SERIOUS”?
- We take YOU and your struggles seriously…because we’ve been there
- We know living in a sexless marriage is serious…and so is showing your kids what a healthy affectionate relationship looks like
- A lack of intimacy of all kinds is serious now and for the long term health of your marriage
- We believe your personal emotional strength and well-being is serious
- We seriously show up 110% to our conversations with you and expect you to be as serious as we are about changing your life
Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity
$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men’s Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. Get instant access to 5 years of recorded sessions. Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?
$397 One-Time Payment: How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a self-paced course with me, Tim Wade, and a community of men learning how to lead when you’ve just heard, “I love you but I’m not in love with you” or “I want to separate or divorce.”
As Teddy Roosevelt said:
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
