In today’s newsletter I want to talk about the difference between what we do here at Goodguys2Greatmen and the myriad of other men’s support / therapy / counselling / Guru’s etc
We are a community of men who give a shit about each other, who are willing to talk about ANYTHING that we’re going through, who are willing to open up and be truthful about real shit that happened in our lives and relationships because we know that discussing these things together with other men is a game changer for you AND for us.
We don’t have a free group that you can join because this journey of being the man you love to be is not something that you learn in a 30 minute video. It’s much more important and much more complex than that.
We are all in this for the rest of our lives.
I commit to you that I will be here for you when you need me and so do the rest of the brothers in this incredible community of men.
I do this not because it’s my job but because I want to be the best version of me and I need other men to help me create the experiences I want to have over the next 20 years – for the sake of my kids, my relationship, my fulfilment in work but most of all for me.
Every decision I make, every choice I take is an opportunity to either improve the man I show the world or to hold him back.
I talk more about this in the video below:
“Every decision you take can either increase your value or decrease it”
It’s the start of another new year and rather than setting my self worth and self respect on someone else’s opinion of me or on how they are attracted to me or like me or how much they’re willing to pay me, my resolution is to continue to learn who I am and what I want to experience.
I know I’ll be successful in this because I’m on a path and I have people who are helping me see which path is right for me.
There are goals and achievements along the way for sure, but each time I reach one of those it’s with eager anticipation of the next challenge and a deepening experience of who I am and what I’m capable of.
Here are 7 statements for you to see whether you might be choosing to live a little below your potential as a man:
You think your wife or girlfriend is in control of the sex in your relationship
You hate your job because nobody listens to your opinion and you have no options to change it
You live pay check to pay check and it restricts what you want to do
You think being kind means making everyone else happy
You don’t have any male friends who question WHY you are unhappy
You’d rather look at porn than deal with the possibility of another rejection
You go with the flow and try not to rock the boat
When you’re upset it’s all consuming and you either shut down and get broody or blow up in frustration
You want to be healthier and fitter but you just can’t seem to make it happen
When you start making decisions with a growth mindset – that each of these decisions is made to improve you FOR YOU – you start to see more clearly that it’s so important to know what is right for you.
And that means you need to know who you are and what you want.
You can make decisions based on other people’s needs and grow.
That’s not to say that you can’t support and care for other people, not at all.
But when you choose to make a decision because it is something you give, like your generosity or your gratitude, then every time you take that action, you grow.
Your self respect grows. Your understanding of who you are grows. Your satisfaction that you are living as the man you know yourself to be grows.
And it feels good.
It feels really good.
Actually it feels so good that you start BEING more relaxed and happier.
And then a strange thing happens…people start wanting to talk to you at places they wouldn’t normally.
Opportunities to do something that you enjoy start to present themselves.
Friends and kids start to want to just hang out and have fun with you.
Wives start wanting to flirt and spend time with you.
And it all comes from this seemingly selfish focus on yourself.
What do I want?
How can I make a decision to create a little of that today, right now even.
I want to get to know you. I want to support you and challenge you. I want to hear what you’re struggling with and learn from you.
That’s what I want.
The Men’s Live Coaching Roundtable is a powerful collection of men from around the world working together to transform themselves and their relationships. Dan Dore and I lead this community with 5 other professional coaches. We have live coaching video calls twice per month. The camaraderie in this group is something missing from the lives of too many men in the world.
Our online course How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a deep and intense dive into handling yourself when you hear, “I love you but I’m not in love with you anymore.” Tim Wade and Steve host monthly live Q&A calls with all the students in this course which includes many other bonuses as well. Find out more here.
We love teaching men these tools – how to be better, how to know who you are, what you stand for, what you want and how to CREATE it in your life through our Masculine Confidence coaching programs.
What if this next year everything changed for you?
That’s what we want for you brother.
My new book Straight Talk Tools for the Desperate Husband will help you to lead yourself and your relationship back to good health. Understand why your partner acts the way she does toward you and learn how to lead your life in the direction you want it to go. You CAN have the relationship you want, fulfilling all your desires while maintaining love and respect.
I wrote a free e-book to help men learn how to lose their fear and be more bold in their marriage to create the love and connection they want. Get The Hard to Swallow Truth About Saving Your Marriage HERE
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