Hey brother,
One of my favorite fiction books is The Art of Racing in the Rain, by Garth Stein. I lost count of how many times this book made my eyeballs swell up…pushing back tears.
It’s about car racing, risk, love, cancer, death, dogs…life.
Here’s one of many classic quotes from the book.
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“There is no dishonor in losing the race. There is only dishonor in not racing because you are afraid to lose.”
One of the main characters is Denny – a race car driver. This guy never loses a race in the rain.
Why?
Because he trained himself to become more comfortable at something that freaked out everyone else.
He learned how to be calm, comfortable and confident when all 4 tires broke loose!
Instead of white-knuckling the steering wheel and sitting on pins and needles he just learned to intentionally go into a 4 wheel skid.
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Why again?
Because it was predictable. He was finally in control. He knew exactly what that car would do in that state…and he milked it good.
He was pushing the scary edge that kept all the other drivers off the gas…tapping their brakes.
But not Denny. He would tap the gas and start his slide into a whole new comfort zone. A zone only HE found comfortable.
From there you can predict what happens. He slides through the turns and passes other drivers like they are standing still.
Some thought he was reckless. But Denny knew better.
Better to tell your car when to skid than sit around wondering when it’s going to skid on you.
Are you still with me?
I’m sure you see where I’m going with this.
This is exactly how I think men should be thinking about their life.
I hung out in the middle of the pack for 30 years – tapping my brakes and letting off the gas.
I was afraid of pushing the scary edges of what I wanted and becoming the man I knew I could be.
I was a people pleasing, egg-shell walking good guy who thought settling for good enough was…well…good enough.
What I learned is that “good enough” is the mindset of a man who is settling for less than what he really wants.
If you want to have a relationship and sex life that rocks your world, you need to be pushing an edge you’ve never faced.
If you want more adventure, variety and spontaneity in your life, you need to make some scary decisions.
Here’s a quick video I made for you about that.
If you want more sex, a more connected nd passionate relationship, a better paying job or a more profitable business you need get comfortable in the 4 wheel skid of increasing your value and asking for what you want
How do you learn to do that?
You do this by pushing your very first scary edge.
For me that meant accepting help and investing in high quality training and experiences. This pushed me out of my comfort zone big time.
What do you have on your calendar that is a little edgy for you?
What feels intimidating but also intriguing?
What are you feeling scared about?
There’s usually a very important desire behind something you feel fear around, so what is that desire?
What do you want?
What edge are you pushing that is making you think differently?
How are you growing as a man, leader, lover, father etc?
One thing I know for sure is that everytime I push myself out of my comfort zone, after the initial self doubt and internal freak out, there’s a shift in my energy, mojo and commitment to creating what I want. It’s a high better than Fat Tire beer provides – and I like me some Fat Tire.
Anyway, this is what I know.
Real change and exponential improvements only happen when we push ourselves into the zone of discomfort.
We have to know when to fearlessly press the gas and when to hit the brakes.
We have to know when it’s time to take a stand, speak up and risk pissing other people off.
And we have to know how to respond to situations that might otherwise control our destiny.
The best place for you to do that is with other men who are doing the same work.
There will be a little “discomfort”.
You will hear stories that will make you blush. We share concepts that might make you uneasy.
But you will make mind-blowing connections and huge realizations through hearing other men’s stories.
Our coaching programs are intense. You will get a powerful new perspectives and TOOLS to fix some things at home that have needed fixing.
You’ll be surrounded by other men like you who want to dig a little deeper.
And you’ll be expected to join us as we push the hairy edge of your vulnerability.
If you want to learn how to turn and face discomfort with a sh*t eating grin, then below are some options for you to change right away…
Free: If you’re serious about building your masculine mojo then apply for a coaching call with us we will help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you feeling confident again.
What do I mean by “SERIOUS”?
- We take YOU and your struggles seriously…because we’ve been there
- We know living in a sexless marriage is serious…and so is showing your kids what a healthy affectionate relationship looks like
- A lack of intimacy of all kinds is serious now and for the long term health of your marriage
- We believe your personal emotional strength and well-being is serious
- We seriously show up 110% to our conversations with you and expect you to be as serious as we are about changing your life
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$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men’s Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. Get instant access to 5 years of recorded sessions. Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?
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As Teddy Roosevelt said:
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
