How Your Anger Affects Your Wife

Your anger affects your wife negatively. The best route is to let it pass quickly. Emotions like shame and feeling vulnerable can fuel anger. I’m going to show you how to calm these emotions.

Today I was perched on the top step of a crooked ladder, standing on one foot with a framing nail gun in my hand as I leaned out to put just ONE MORE nail in the siding.

Everything in my brain said, “this is stupid”, but I kept going.

Then BAM! I was on a pile of rocks with blood running down my arm.

Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity >>

The anger was already boiling before I even hit the ground. I knew exactly what happened and why.

Then the embarrassment set in as I DID have a witness. The worst kind. The one woman I would prefer to see me in a better light.

I’ve always loved building stuff. Especially when it’s well planned, organized and things go just how I imagine they should.

This She Shed/He Shed project has mostly gone really well. Until today.

I was in a hurry. Rain was coming. And I thought I could take the kind of risks I used to take when I was 29 – not 59. Actually, the risks never paid off then and they didn’t today.

I explain the whole thing (and show you my boo-boo) in this video.

YouTube video

How to Not Die a Grumpy Old Man

Your Anger Affects Your Wife But Your Anger Behind Your Anger Affects You.

We tend to believe that anger is simple. We think it’s a normal emotional reaction to something that ticks us off, offends us or scares us.

Have you ever had an angry outburst over something only to realize later there was something else going on inside you? Has your temper ever gotten so ridiculous that you became more angry at yourself for allowing it to go that far?

All too often what’s hiding behind our externally expressed anger is the SHAME of not doing better, knowing better or BEING better.

That’s what I was really mad about today. And guess what?

I’ve learned that the SOONER I ADMIT IT the better I feel and the better the day goes from that point forward.

Typically, we will make quick moves to defend our anger and silly outbursts because admitting we’re ashamed of being an ass is too much to bear.

My coaching for you today is to MOVE FAST to admitting the truth. Yes…out loud. Admit to yourself and admit to any witnesses (or victims) of your anger.

One reason women absolutely hate it when their man gets mad is because it scares them. They think we don’t have any control and we don’t have the ability to see how badly it affects others.

When we can quickly show that we have a handle on it, own it, laugh at ourselves and move on…the faster your relationship will get back to normal. I guarantee it. Try it this weekend.

If you’re reading this email and thinking, “Damn, I wish I had other guys to talk to about this stuff.” join the club.

I know exactly what you mean. I spent 5 decades THINKING about this stuff, secretly reading about this stuff, but had nobody who really enjoyed TALKING about this stuff.

It turns out the most powerful, interesting, confident and courageous men I’ve found are those who have the ability to be open, honest, unapologetic and vulnerable about this stuff. It’s changed my life. I want the same for you.

When I say “join the club” I mean it.

Chronic anger takes its toll on a man. You can see how your anger affects your wife too. Connect with safe men who are not afraid of their vulnerability. Heal your shame with men who care for you as a brother. A man who does this finds his anger passes quickly.

Join Dan Dore and I in the Men’s Live Coaching Roundtable group for amazing conversation, coaching and insights. This is stuff your dad never told you.

And if you’re on the edge of divorce with threats of leaving or requests for “space” then the How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb online course would be perfect. This course taught by coach Tim Wade and I also has a large, active group of powerful men who support each other on a daily basis. It’s possible that the group interaction is more valuable than the 9 hours of video coaching in the course!

As we say without reservation in the video, “This shit works!”

Click those links to get more information, videos and FAQ’s. You’re in the right place.

author avatar
Steve Horsmon Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Steve Horsmon is a Certified Professional Life Coach and owner of Goodguys2Greatmen Relationship Coaching in Livermore, Colorado. He has appeared on well known coachign and psychology television, radio, youtube, and podcast channels related to maintaining healthy relationships. Steve provides intensely personal, action oriented coaching services for men through 1-on-1 coaching, private retreats and workshops designed to give men new knowledge, skills and mindset to achieve their relationship goals. He is a committed, lifelong mentor who teaches his clients to discover their masculine power, take bold action and create the life they want. He has written articles and guest blogs for numerous relationship and expert websites.

Frequently Asked Questions


Is our coaching right for you?

Our coaching process was created for men who want to feel happier and more fulfilled in their life and relationships. We teach you how to have more confidence and clarity about what you want in your life and create an action plan to start making it happen.

Do you only work with men in marriage?

While our coaching teaches you how to create a more connected, more fun and passionate marriage, we also work with you to have more clarity, enthusiasm and fulfillment in all areas of your life. We help you understand what you really want your future to look like and we also teach you how to be in control of your emotions so that you can be confident and assertive no matter how difficult your circumstances are right now .

What happens in the free 90-minute coaching call?

In our free initial coaching calls, we listen a lot, we ask you questions to understand what life is really like for you at the moment, we help you identify what you want to be different and what's holding you back from creating those changes now. Then we help you create a practical plan of action to start moving forward straight away.

What will I learn in your coaching programs?

We take you through a process to:

  • Stop being tentative and become more focused and directed.
  • Develop control over your thoughts and emotions like never before.
  • Become a master of the masculine and feminine dance required for a more passionate connection in your romantic relationships.
  • Build and sustain your personal masculine confidence so that you don't get "triggered" or feel disrespected and can respond with strength and confidence to any situation.
  • Become more connected, aware and present with everyone (this is a critical step in your ability to build attraction and desire as well as have people trust you and respect you more).
  • Stop the destructive emotions of anger and resentment which keep you going around in frustrating cycles and start from moving forward with purpose.
  • Stop being anxious, needy and overly reliant upon other people's opinions and approval of you and start feeling more peace, happiness and a deep sense of being a man who is confident in himself again.
  • You will become a confident man who knows his values, what he wants and where he’s going in his life.
  • You will learn how to think, speak and act according to your values without worrying about reactions from others.
  • You become clear and confident in your ability to create intimacy whenever you want.
  • Your confidence will be something that you start to rely on and trust in every part of your life.

How does the Men's Roundtable work?

Our Men's Roundtable membership gives you access to 3 live group coaching calls per month hosted by Steve and Dan as well as access to over 5 years of previously recorded group coaching calls, an invitation to our private facebook group, and ongoing assignments and resources to help you grow and develop as a confident masculine man. It's like having a personal coach in your pocket, ready to help whenever you need it.

What's the difference between the 1-to-1 coaching and group coaching?

Firstly, anyone who is in our 1-to-1 coaching program automatically receives access to the Men's Roundtable membership and group coaching for free for life. The difference between 1-to-1 and group coaching is down to the speed of change that you want to happen. With more personal time and attention from your coach, the 1-to-1 program is adapted to your specific circumstances and will provide the practical advice you need to know what to think, say and do to create what you want your future to be.

What kind of man is right for your coaching?

We work with men who are willing to take the lead in creating the changes they want in their life and relationships. We only work with men who want to understand their fears, insecurities and shame triggers. We teach you practical ways to deal with the mental and emotional challenges life throws at you and help you reach an unshakeable confidence in yourself (often for the first time in your life).

  • You won’t find negative, hateful language.
  • You won’t find a gender war – we don’t bash women.
  • You won’t find bitching, whining, complaining, and blaming.
  • You won’t find a group of men acting like victims.
  • You won’t find judgment or criticism from others.

We don't waste our time with all those things because we want to take the most efficient and effective path to creating the future you want. So we focus only on the things that are within your control: your thoughts, your words and your actions.

How do I know if I need coaching?

If you are feeling unhappy a lot of the time, if you're lonely, drained, lost, stuck or trapped, then our coaching will help. If you're not sure where your life is headed, if you're not confident in yourself, if you're not sure what you really want in life anymore...our coaching will help.

Whether it’s your job, your intimate relationship, or just wanting to feel more happy and with more purpose, then our coaching will help.

If you are tired of settling for a mediocre life or relationship, tolerating criticism and a lack of fun and intimacy and you're done with placating and playing it safe, then our coaching will help.

We will help you have clarity about what you're REALLY passionate about. We'll get you clear about where you want to be in six months and in six years. We help you figure out what you really want to create vs what other people think you should do.

We help you take action, get unstuck, start moving forward. We help you find what matters instead of just "being busy" in the daily grind. We help you figure out how you're going to get from where you are now to where you want to be.

For many of the guys we work with, they find a peace and a sense of emotional freedom that has them shaking their heads and smiling at how they used to approach life. They feel passionate about life again. They build stronger relationships with the people that matter most to them. They feel satisfied and fulfilled that they have finally found the “right path” forward and life starts to feel fun and inspiring again.

So now you've read that...what do you think? Would YOU like to try some of our coaching for free?

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

This is the secret your dad never told you about – You have more power than you know.

We respect your privacy, read our privacy policy here