How To Create a More Sexual Marriage

“When you get to the end zone, act like you’ve been there before” ~ Tom Landry, Vince Lombardi or Bear Bryant

I’ve always loved that quote.

It was in response to the emerging tradition of “End Zone Celebrations” in the U.S. National Football League in the late 1960’s.

The coaches disliked the childish practice and wanted the players to have a mature, professional and ABUNDANT mindset about getting into the end zone.

Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity >>

I don’t want to argue that topic here. I want to make a bigger point about your sex life.

And I think you know where I’m going with this metaphor.

On the football field those coaches wanted their players to have more self-respect, confidence and emotional mastery without acting like scoring was a big surprise.

They wanted their players to embody the belief and attitude that there is PLENTY MORE where that came from and they know just how it’s accomplished.

With this belief they could be more poised, more relaxed and more focused on the PROCESS of creating more touchdowns.

What’s this have to do with your sexual satisfaction?

I’ll tell you more in this video.

YouTube video

Sexually Satisfied Men Share These Three Basic Traits

1. High level of self-respect and keen awareness of their masculine value.

2. Unshakable confidence based not in what they know or do, but in who they ARE.

3. Emotional mastery of their sexual nature and sexual desires.

I consider these BASELINE traits because they all require a solid core of inner security and maturity.

You shouldn’t work on ANYTHING ELSE until you’ve acquired a strong core of mature self-respect, secure confidence and mastery of your sexual nature.

When a man is insecure and immature (believe me, I know) those traits are impossible to acquire.


1. Because his “self-respect” comes across as entitlement and indignation.

2. His confidence comes across as arrogant and controlling.

3. And his unbridled sexual nature causes scary and unpredictable emotional spikes in the form of shame, anger and outbursts.

Our coaching programs and retreats are designed to focus specifically on permanently eliminating those problems. We challenge your stories, your “yeah buts” and all of the rationalizations we make for not being stronger men.

For most of us that requires a SHOCK to our masculine heart so we can change our perspective and start being the self-respecting, confident and sexy man we know we can be.

Advanced Traits in Sexually Satisfied Men

I want you to watch the fun video below.

The male actor is displaying some ADVANCED traits which are possible only after the basic traits are acquired.

In this video he shows:

1. Absolute outcome independence

2. Fearlessness in the face of judgment or rejection

3. Unapologetic sexuality without urgency

4. A clear passion for his personal mission

5. Ability to create sexual tension and polarity

See if you can pick these out when you watch it.

YouTube video

Where are you right now?

I consider this whole journey a mountain with no top.

Could I easily pull off what the guy in the video did?

Hell no!

I don’t have a private plane and I don’t have the calm courage and cojones to invite two ladies I just met to make love over a weekend getaway. (my girlfriend would object as well)

But…it’s a MINDSET and I’m closer to that than I’ve ever been and I’ve got about 30 yrs. of more climbing to do!

That’s what I want for you. I just want you to START THE CLIMB NOW.

I started around my 50th birthday…maybe you’ll have a faster start than I did!

How to Know Where You Stand?

I’ve created a 12-Point Personal Development Scorecard that can help you answer this question.

This scorecard helps you SCORE YOURSELF on the journey from Good Guy to Great Man in 12 key areas including:

Social Life

We will give you this scorecard and a free consultation to discuss it, all you have to do is apply for a consultation here. No strings. No sales pitches. No timeshare presentation.

We’re here to help you get climbing.

And if you’re ready to start climbing sooner than later, below are some opportunities to help SHOCK you into the perspective I’ve been talking about in this article and join other men who are climbing fast and getting stronger every day,

The Men’s Live Coaching Roundtable is a powerful collection of men from around the world working together to transform themselves and their relationships. Dan Dore and I lead this community with 5 other professional coaches. We have live coaching video calls twice per month. The camaraderie in this group is something missing from the lives of too many men in the world.

Our online course How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a deep and intense dive into handling yourself when you hear, “I love you but I’m not in love with you anymore.” Tim Wade and Steve host monthly live Q&A calls with all the students in this course which includes many other bonuses as well. Find out more here.

We love teaching men these tools – how to be better, how to know who you are, what you stand for, what you want and how to CREATE it in your life through our Masculine Confidence coaching programs.

What if this next year everything changed for you?

That’s what we want for you brother.

My new book Straight Talk Tools for the Desperate Husband will help you to lead yourself and your relationship back to good health. Understand why your partner acts the way she does toward you and learn how to lead your life in the direction you want it to go. You CAN have the relationship you want, fulfilling all your desires while maintaining love and respect.

I wrote a free e-book to help men learn how to lose their fear and be more bold in their marriage to create the love and connection they want. Get The Hard to Swallow Truth About Saving Your Marriage.

author avatar
Steve Horsmon Certified Professional Men’s Coach
Steve Horsmon is a Certified Professional Life Coach and owner of Goodguys2Greatmen Relationship Coaching in Livermore, Colorado. He has appeared on many television, radio, youtube, and podcast channels discussing the coaching and psychology factors relating to maintaining healthy relationships. Steve provides personal, practical, action oriented coaching services for men through 1-on-1 coaching, private retreats, group coaching and workshops designed to give men new knowledge, skills and the right mindset to achieve their relationship goals. He is a committed, lifelong mentor for men who teaches his clients how to discover their masculine strength so they can confidently take the actions required to create the life and relationships that they really want. With over 10 years experience he has created thousands of videos and articles for well known relationship websites such as The Good Men Project, Medium and the Gottman Institute.
The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

The Hard-to-Swallow Secret to Saving Your Marriage

This is the secret your dad never told you about – You have more power than you know.

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