The Goodguys2Greatmen Masculine Mastery Scorecard
Becoming a Great Man is a process of changing the way you think about your ability to create the life and relationships you truly want. Read the descriptions below and rate yourself from 1-12 across the 12 life categories to see where you are right now and where your next growth stage is.
Work/Career
-
Good Guy
Work always feels like a struggle. You hate Mondays. You are a disengaged clock watcher and you feel stuck in something that drains you. You don’t have any plans for changing your circumstances. You see your “superiors” as idiots and adversaries.
-
Awakened Guy
You realize that your current status at work/business is your own creation. You know you want to stop settling for doing work that is draining and uninspiring but you don’t know how/where to start. You actually start bitching about work more than ever before.
-
Enlightened Guy
You’ve taken the first baby steps to changing your circumstances. You’ve applied for a different job, renegotiated your current assignment or started redefining your business goals to align with your values and desires. You feel energized and proud of yourself for shaking things up. Your new energy may be making others nervous, threatened or attracted.
-
Great Man
Mondays and Fridays are all the same to you. You don’t see time as something to “get through”, you regard it as a gift to use. You clearly see how your work integrates with your higher mission. Your work is a source of energy and inspiration. You embrace your creative thinking to redefine and refocus your work to align with your standards and your mission.
Mission
-
Good Guy
You’re not aware of the concept of “mission” and have no clarity around what yours might be. You are in a routine of life that seems to control you and you feel that a “higher purpose” is for other kinds of people.
-
Awakened Guy
You’re noticing when people mention the idea of “having a mission” and you’re curious. You’ve read an article or book about being a “man with a mission” but still think it’s a luxury reserved for someone besides you. You are more restless than ever before.
-
Enlightened Guy
You’ve decided you’re done trying to make everyone else happy all the time. You have a growing sense of desire for autonomy and significance. You’re saying “Life is too short” a lot. You’ve attended a workshop or seminar about “finding your passion” and you talk about it without embarrassment.
-
Great Man
You have learned that “finding your mission” is a process of growth…not a goal to achieve. You’ve achieved clarity about your special “Zone of Genius”. You’re clear about how you want to be in the world and who you want in it. You’re creating long term relationships with people who inspire you to stay focused and be the best version of you. You get excited when you think about the number of possibilities you have in front of you.
Money
-
Good Guy
You live paycheck to paycheck. You’ve got no savings or long term plan. You avoid thinking about it. You spend more money than you make most months. You secretly worry about mounting debt but are afraid of looking into it and seeing how bad things are.
-
Awakened Guy
You’ve looked at your finances formally on your own or with a professional. You’re shocked at how far behind you are. You feel a sense of panic and urgency to make changes fast but you’ve made no commitment to do so
-
Enlightened Guy
You’ve implemented a tactical plan to control expenses and have put a sound saving/investment strategy in place. You’ve automated your monthly savings and now “pay yourself first”. Your debt levels are dropping each month and you have a clear plan and timeline to become debt free. The topic of money no longer puts a knot in your stomach.
-
Great Man
You view money as an indicator of how well you are living into your purpose. Money is not the source of your happiness – it is the result of it. You have a plan for securing your future and it calms you. You actively seek advice and information to improve your plan. You are debt free and, therefore, are confident to invest or give whatever you please. You give time and money away consistently to people/causes you care about.
Women
-
Good Guy
You are confused by women. You believe in the notion of “happy wife happy life “. You laugh nervously at the phrase, “If momma ain’t happy then nobody’s happy!” You are constantly avoiding conflict with women. You are a “rescuer” who tries valiantly to make women happy in order to feel secure and happy with yourself. You secretly crave the accolades and approval of women. You are quietly resentful and angry that your desires are not being met.
-
Awakened Guy
You’ve become acutely aware that something is wrong with your relationship to women. The word “neediness” makes you cringe and you want to know how to change. You’ve read some articles in the “Manosphere” online and you’re intrigued with the language, ideas and notion of becoming confident and free from feeling dependent on feminine approval. You spend a lot of time on forums reading about this new world and way of thinking…but you don’t talk about it with anyone else.
-
Enlightened Guy
You’ve begun seeing things differently with women. Your growing confidence is fueled by a clearer understanding of and empathy for a woman’s journey. You’re initiating conversations and comfortably discussing different points of view. Disagreements no longer rattle you. You are seeing the power in your ability to set the tone and create a safe environment without fear of being judged, rejected or manipulated. You are more calm and relaxed even when emotions are running high.
-
Great Man
You fearlessly embrace women as your equal. You also fearlessly embrace our polar differences by “dancing” with them. Sexual tension and romance are your playground. You empathize and listen to them without fear, judgment or defensiveness. You confidently challenge men who are hateful, fearful or disrespectful to women. You are wholly independent from feminine validation. You use your innate happiness and well-being as a gift. You stand tall in conflict and respond swiftly and unapologetically to disrespect or toxic behavior.
Social Life
-
Good Guy
Your social life is largely driven by someone else’s agenda. Most of your friends are her friends. You go along to get along. You’re quietly bored to tears and drained energetically. You wish you had more male friends you could trust and talk to. You sometimes feel alone and like a total outsider even in a crowd.
-
Awakened Guy
You’re becoming increasing agitated and impatient with hanging around people who bore you or those you don’t like or respect. There are social functions or groups you would like to explore but are hesitant. You’re concerned about rocking the boat at home and the uncertainty of making new connections.
-
Enlightened Guy
You’ve gained clearer perspective of who you want to socialize with and why. You make regular invitations to people you want to spend time with. You have begun to connect with higher quality people who share your values at your job/business. You have started to decline invitations to be with people or in places that drain you of energy.
-
Great Man
You have created a social life that fits your priorities and your mission. You surround yourself with people and places that inspire and energize you. You are laser focused on eliminating places and people who oppose your purpose, violate your values and sabotage your energy. You make no apologies for your particular style of engagement and you don’t worry about what others think about you, your values or your mission. You are gracious and curious. You ask powerful questions. You listen more than you talk.
Sex
-
Good Guy
You think about sex 24/7 and have simmering feelings of resentment or anger toward women. You may envy other men or happy couples who are clearly having good sex. Your use of porn and frequency of masturbation are high (even in your book) and you feel ashamed about it. You speak about sex with trepidation due to lack of sexual confidence and what others think of you.
-
Awakened Guy
You’ve become aware of how common your sexual battle is. You’ve read articles or books about sexuality, sexual confidence or managing sexual energy and you are intrigued. You are more aware of your compulsion around sex and know there is a better way but you’re not sure where to start.
-
Enlightened Guy
You are actively trying to change your old habits and rituals around sex. You are consistently seeking expert information and advice as you’re becoming a student of sexuality. You are more honest talking about your challenges and desires. You are more confident in talking about sex with anyone. You no longer feel shame about your own sexuality.
-
Great Man
You are an unapologetic and confident sexual man. This means you are relaxed and self-assured in your sexual value and knowledge. While sex is a key part of your happiness equation, it does not dominate your energy and thoughts to the detriment of your mission. You speak about sex without hesitation and you are empathetic towards the sexual insecurities you see in others. Sex to you is not something to earn or win – it is a gift you offer judiciously.
Productivity
-
Good Guy
You get just enough done to keep your head above water at work and home. You know you could accomplish more but lack drive and a sense of purpose. You have trouble with following through on your promises and you are routinely reminded of that by others.
-
Awakened Guy
You’ve begun to see how your lack of intention and follow through is affecting your life and relationship. You want to step up your game but don’t have the tools or mindset to be consistent. You stay mad at yourself for not achieving more on a daily basis.
-
Enlightened Guy
You are pushing yourself hard to tackle some of the projects and goals you’ve been wanting to accomplish. You’ve started some new habits and are making headway but get frustrated a lot when you catch yourself being lazy and indecisive.
-
Great Man
You are a man with a plan. Sometimes that plan is to just chill out and recharge. Sometimes that plan is to focus and create something. But you are always mindful of your plan and your use of time. You follow through on your plans and commitments simply because you love being that guy
Values
-
Good Guy
You haven’t given much thought about your values or core operating principles. You tend to go with the flow a lot don’t set boundaries, don’t rock the boat and don’t stand up for yourself. You tend to negotiate compromise and sacrifice a lot and it secretly pisses you off.
-
Awakened Guy
You’re starting to realize that people tend to “cross the line” a lot – but you don’t know where that line is. You want to have boundaries but are uncertain about what they are. You may be getting impatient and angry with others who seem to have control over you and your feelings. You’re having more defensive outbursts than normal and that isn’t working well for you.
-
Enlightened Guy
You have begun to get clear about what you expect of yourself in various situations and you’re holding yourself accountable to a higher standard. You notice that others may not share or respect your standards so you try to put rules or expectations in place to get them to meet your needs. This isn’t working well for you. You’re frustrated sometimes that you are changing but nobody else is.
-
Great Man
You have given serious thought and time to developing your “operating principles”. You are clear about who you are and what you expect of yourself and what you expect for yourself. Your boundaries are clear and nonnegotiable. You use your values as a source of clarity and confidence. You are accountable to your own standards of behavior and you consistently demonstrate these standards without dominating or forcing rules on others.
Emotions
-
Good Guy
Your emotions are primary indicators and instigators for you. You have no control or understanding about where they come from or how to change them. You feel ruled by your emotional world. You feel like you react to everything before you get a chance to think first.
-
Awakened Guy
You’ve realized that your negative and defensive reactions are causing a lot of trouble in your life. You want to change but are still controlled by your “temper”. Your new awareness makes you apologize more quickly but often it’s too late and the damage is done. You may be thinking your emotional nature is just “the way I am”.
-
Enlightened Guy
You have started seeing that your emotions are not just things that happen outside of your control. You understand that your thoughts are generating your negative emotions and reactions. You’re starting to experiment with being more self-aware and monitoring your emotions. You’re finding out that responding calmly feels a lot better than your old way of operating.
-
Great Man
You are the master of your emotional world. This means you allow yourself to feel your full range of emotions and to express them. You are confident in your ability to understand the thoughts and fears behind your negative emotions. You see emotional triggers as cues to become curious and to go deeper into your thinking. Others feel calmed by your consistent grounded nature.
Spirituality
-
Good Guy
The word “spiritual” bugs you in general. You don’t have a connection to any higher level belief, faith or thoughts that you can use to your own benefit. You resist or mock the idea of woo-woo spirituality notions.
-
Awakened Guy
You’re curious about how to define what “spirituality” means to you. You’re aware that there is a benefit to thinking more spiritually but you’re not sure what it is for you. You have a hard time explaining what you think and believe about spiritual energy, but you no longer dismiss it outright.
-
Enlightened Guy
You’ve decided there is something important about spiritual thinking. You’re developing a clear vision of what spirituality means to you and how it shows up in your life. You can give examples of ways you use your spirituality in your personal growth and in your daily life.
-
Great Man
You are clear and confident in your spiritual development. Whatever “spiritual” means to you, you are able to convey your beliefs to others with warmth and without judgement. You feel calm and solid in your belief that your emotional and behavioral confidence are founded in your spiritual confidence.
Temperament
-
Good Guy
You feel and act dull, uninspired, victimized, avoidant, argumentative, resentful, drained, detached, hopeless and/or angry…a lot.
-
Awakened Guy
You’ve awakened to the fact that you don’t like how you’re showing up. You’re realizing that many of your undesirable circumstances and relationships are caused by your unattractive energy. You’ve started faking being happier to see if that might help.
-
Enlightened Guy
You’re realizing that your moods and emotions are your own creation. You’ve accepted the challenge and the responsibility to create a more positive and self-aware mindset. You’re doing this because it makes you feel good…but you quietly hope it makes others happy too.
-
Great Man
Your moods are consistent and predictable. You engage with others in a way that makes them feel like they are the only one in the room. You are approachable while you protect your time and priorities. People feel better after having been with you.
Health/Fitness
-
Good Guy
You rate your overall health and fitness level somewhere below 5 on a scale of 1-10. That secretly annoys you, but you do nothing with your habits or routines to change it. When someone brings it up you go silent and change the subject.
-
Awakened Guy
You’re realizing that your weight, stamina, flexibility and strength are slowly decaying and it’s starting to bother you. You may be trying fleeting attempts at diets and exercise but you know deep down you can do a whole lot better than this.
-
Enlightened Guy
You’ve made a mental commitment to yourself to change. You’re actively seeking information and opportunities for exercise and you’ve done a few things that make you feel good. It takes a lot of work, however. Nothing you’re doing is a habit yet – just sheer will power.
-
Great Man
You have created a change in your lifestyle around fitness and nutrition. You’ve mastered eating and exercising in a way that is uniquely suited for you and it’s a habit you can’t break. You are enjoying more energy, fun, strength and confidence as a result.
Enter your email below to receive your scorecard results along with some free coaching videos to help you move towards the next level of growth in each category.
If you're not interested in our free coaching advice you can access your basic scorecard results by clicking the button below.
